Until I had a newborn, I don't think I really understood the impact that sleep (or lack thereof) had on my life. I mean, the amount of sleep I get really influences what kind of day I'll have. I really hate that. Why should something have such importance and a hold over my life?
Rachel sleeps pretty good most of the time. We had a pretty rough night last night though. She woke up several times, and really just acted like she wanted to be held. Hopefully it was just the shots from yesterday making her feel bad, and not a habitual thing.
I think the non-routine of it all is the hardest for me. One night she won't wake up, and I'll be ecstatic! Then the next night she'll wake up a couple of times. Inevitably, those wake-ful nights are the ones where I stayed up a little too long the night before. But I just never know what's in store.
And it's not just the sleep during the night that controls me. It's the nap schedules. I feel consumed with trying to figure out a good nap schedule for Rachel. She was taking 3 naps a day, but the times were very inconsistent. And then I thought we were developing a pattern. She would take a nap, then usually stay up for about 2 - 2 1/2 hours then take another nap. But that's all changed as well. She stays up for a lot longer, but I'm always doubting whether I should be putting her to sleep or not.
And not to mention the other two. They have a pretty regular naptime at about 1 to 1:30. But sometimes things interfere. Like church getting out late, a doctor's appt, or a birthday party. I'm always trying to plan around it. And now Elijah is getting older, so when do I stop giving him a nap? (never! haha)
Anyways, like I said...I really hate how consuming "sleep" is. I don't want to be affected by the number of hours I get at night. I want to have a good day despite it. I don't want to worry about when naps will take place.
I guess it's just a delicate balance. As a mother, you definitely have to think about these things. But I think I overthink it. If the babies miss a nap every once in a while, we will survive. I'm learning to not be so worried about it all, but it's definitely a work in progress!
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I hear ya! I feel like I have had weeks where my attitude was determined by mine and Lucy's sleep schedule (or lack thereof). And now that we are specifically trying to help her sleep through the night, it definitely consumes my thoughts, and I can also get a little crazy if I think she's going to miss a nap, etc. I just have to let go and realize, like you said, that the world will go on if she misses a nap or goes to bed too late or something. Did you ever think before you were a mom that we would be writing whole blog posts about sleep? haha.
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